Hypnotherapy for Anger Management
What is anger?
Where the anger comes from?
What is anger management?
How hypnotherapy can help
you with anger?
How Family
Constellations can help you with anger?
Anger is an emotion which arises in response to any event
which we may interpret as crossing our boundaries and attacking. We respond with
anger when we feel that we need to defend ourselves physically, our family
members or our country, our property, our values and even our entitlements.
Anger is the response to attack when we can lose something, but also when we do
not receive what we feel we deserve. Anger is a prompt for attack as the best
defence; the emotion is associated with biological changes in the body as the
body prepares for combat, the stress enzymes are released, the blood pressure
rises, the heart beats quicker, and we may feel hot and even start shaking. The
biological changes can be very rapid when the strong anger arises, and it can
quickly turn into a violent rage without much thinking. Sometimes the opposite
happens, we mentally block the prolonged frustration and anger and the
biological changes like high blood pressure and stress enzymes become permanent,
leading to a serious health problems.
Anger is most often a secondary emotion, caused by fear,
insecurity, low confidence, hurt and pain. When you are confident and secure,
you do not need to respond with anger to critics or judgments. The words or
actions of other people do not affect you when your self-esteem is strong, your
feel your worth and you treat critics as getting a feedback and good tips to
improve. Yes, when you are confident and open, you are grateful for critics, as
it helps you to grow and learn.
Similarly, when we hold hurt and pain in our hearts, we are
afraid of more hurt and pain, and we respond with anger when we feel that it may
happen again. It is also easier to hold onto anger, because it makes us stronger
to be angry than hurt and sad, and the old anger is revoked at any situation
which reminds us of the old hurt. Those connections are on the subconscious
level, very often not logical, difficult to trace.
We are also angry when we are denied the fulfilment of our
desires. Some people are carrying anger and resentment from their younger years.
Life is a challenge and has many needs. Baby cries with anger when it is hungry;
little child will be angry when her sister has more attention from parents.
Having more, accumulating goods, receiving awards etc makes us feel secure and
important, and stronger. So again, the desires, the need to receive comes from
basic insecurities and low confidence. The unreasonable anger when somebody
receives more has also usually roots in the past. When we are free from this
kind of desire, the need to grasp, the need to be special, the need to be better
than others or have more, we are free not only from this sort of anger, we are
free to use or potential to achieve more.
And there is also the primary anger, just a survival tool,
which prompts us to action when we are in real danger, or there is a real danger
to others, or our basic values are attacked. This kind of anger allows us to
overcome the paralysing fear so we can stand up for ourselves and defend our
basic existence.
Anger management is about acknowledging and expressing your
anger in an acceptable way. Uncontrolled anger creates problems, makes
relationships difficult, can be damaging for us and for our surrounding, as it
easily leads to abusive words or acts of violence, and even to the jail
sentence. Denying the anger and suppressing it builds the pressure and leads to
uncontrolled eruption when we cannot stand it anymore. It also affects health
and brings other emotions, like guilt when we condemn ourselves for anger. It is
better to express anger in a respectful way.
Anger management is also about understanding your anger and
being able to prevent it in the first place by knowing the triggers and finding
the ways to solve the situation before the anger arises. We can train ourselves
to stay rational instead of letting the anger blind us out, so we can assess the
situation and realize that we overact, that the threat is not real. We can learn
relaxation techniques, as it is rather difficult to become angry when you are
totally relaxed. We can learn many other ways to deal with strong emotions.
Hypnotherapy is the best tool for anger management, because
it allows you to access your internal resources to find the best solutions to
manage your anger. You can also implement your solutions in hypnosis and
rehearse the challenging situations, still in hypnosis. This way the solutions
are working on both conscious and subconscious levels, so it is like the
automatic habit change. With hypnotherapy and some NLP techniques performed in
hypnosis, we can also neutralize the triggers, so you will be much calmer in the
situations which would normally bring anger.
Hypnotherapy also allows you to understand you anger
better, by going not only to the current situations which bring anger, but also
to the original events which are the reasons for the triggers. These events are
usually forgotten, buried deep in subconscious mind. We can access them while in
deep hypnosis and we can change the beliefs and perceptions of the past, because
we can see it now with reason, through the adult eyes, not through the eyes of a
frightened child. Once this is done, the anger dissolves, as the old triggers
become neutral.
And we can do even more, much more than just managing the
anger, we can create the real miracles in hypnosis. Hypnotherapy will help you
to resolve the real reasons for anger, depression, anxiety and fear, insecurity,
low confidence, hurt and pain or deep sadness. All those underlying emotions are
often hidden deep in the subconscious mind and are difficult to trace. With
hypnotherapy, we can access the subconscious mind and solve the anger by dealing
with and letting go the causes of underlying emotions. As a result, we are more
confident, relaxed, stronger and happier, so we do not need to be angry
anymore.
Very often there is a history of violence and anger or pain
and hurt in the family, and it can be passed from generation to generation.
Family Constellations therapy allows accessing and dissolving those issues, even
if they are deeply rooted in the past.
Sometimes there is a lot of anger and even hate towards our
parents. Perhaps your father was violent towards your mother and you, perhaps
your mother was drinking and neglecting you, perhaps one of the parents left the
family, maybe parents left you for adoption. You can carry anger and hate though
your whole life even for other things, perhaps parents were showing more
interest to your siblings and you felt ignored or neglected, perhaps you were
criticized or controlled.
Very often similar anger and hurt which you may originally
feel towards your father is transferred on the subconscious level to your
husband. And sometimes you act the same way towards your children as you parents
were when you were a child. All those patterns and many other can be resolved
and stopped during the Family Constellations therapy, which may be performed
during the private hypnotherapy session or in the workshop. The solution brings
peace and calmness coming from acceptance and understanding at the deepest level
of our being.
